sometimes

you just got to say fuck it. no matter what you do and what you think you can do, sometimes somethings are beyond your repair. and all you got to say, is fuck it. it's so hard to just let it be because you think, maybe this time it will be different. and it never is. and you never stop being hurt because there is that glimmer of false hope that looms in the distance, ominously. you think people are different, that others dont know them like you do. that is all bullshit. people are different in fact, but not for the better. building them up in your mind is only going to hurt you more when they fall from grace. to all this, i say fuck it. fuck putting yourself in a position to get hurt. we all do it to ourselves and then when we do in fact get hurt, it's someone else's fault. accepting responsibility for feeling like this is fucked too. fuck trying, and fuck believing that things can turn out for the better, than it can turn out otherwise. there are so many wonderful things in this world, why get so caught up in the bad stuff, right? why do we forget about the good things when there are so many and one bad thing can just come and fuck it all up? i hope one day i can look back at all this and laugh.