catching up

after a lackluster spring (and yet another lackluster spring to follow (thus far)) fall has knocked me on my ass as far as amazing shit that is out there that i need in my life now. a sampling of the list:

david wyatt maypole shoes. i love the shape and the color. i've never been known to kick a whimsical shoe out of bed


so these nina ricci boots are the closest thing i will ever come to the heel-less runway versions. i think i need to give my chloe boots a day off and try these babies out for size


i want to live right there in this 1960s kitchen. i want to be that woman that serves chocolate icebox cake right next to the carousel horses and candy striped stools. AMAZING


if i were a 1940s film noir movie star, or a person that makes more money than your average 16 year old, i would glady wear this vintage crepe gown with spiderweb bead detailing to death. i am more willing to drop a little extra money on amazing vintage just because i know im not going to find it for 80% off at the barneys warehouse sale at the end of the season


why hellllooo charlotte olympia wedges. these behemoth wedges look straight out of a tim burton movie. im actively working on losing my tan. once i turn a satisfactory shade of alabaster, maybe ill reward myself with this masterpiece


Thea cadabra shoes. i would be hesitant to even refer to these gems as shoes. more like wearable art. the difficult decision now is to decide which one to order. there is the fabulous rain storm shoe


bat shoes

ice cream shoes

how have these shoes flown under my radar for so long?

also, i would like to own these diamante bow chloe shoes. let it be said, though, that the salesgirls at chloe are in their own league of cuntliness. they make the too-cool-to-live salespeople at marc by marc jacobs seem almost human

these chanel shoes that i never saw in stores, but only saw in a size 10 on bluefly. it's like my michelin man meets mary quant fantasy mmmmm



that's it.. for today anyway. also, how lame are the spring shows shaping up to be? Danielle Scutt and Basso & Brooke have been the only ones whose shows i've loved. at least ill be able to give my credit cards a break next season. that is only if paris and milan are a let down too!

welcome back

the ebay gods have been smiling down upon me as of late. after an endless string of disappointments, much like my life, things are finally turning around. things i want from topshop end up in my order (that NEVER happens!) so you know im operating on some serious luck here. my closet has never been better! example:



comme des garcons fall 2007 3-d hand skirt. who needs the warm embrace of a boyfriend when my hips can be embraced by disembodied pepto bismol pink stuffed hands?



finally, after what seems like decades, i got the damn miu miu teacup shoes. even more glorious than i had imagined. when i put them on, it's like i'm straight out of one of lewis carroll's pyschotic cocaine dazes and thrust into the not-so-magical burbs of orange county.



topshop unique leotard. completely useless but now i can rest easy at night knowing it is safe within the confines of my closet. maybe i'll wear it to coachella? your options tend to be limited in 839045 degree weather.



another reason why i love etsy: it will bring me closer to my japanese horror rodarte dreams than the sad, stretched seafoam green metallic knits at nordstrom rack ever will. this fabulous etsyer knit them for me and although i haven't worn them out, just putting them on and prancing around the house has been satiating enough.



ok so i know i totally work at betsey johnson, and i should have enough betsey dresses in my arsenal to last me several lifetimes, i still troll the bay for amazing dresses i missed out on, e.g., this seashell print silk babydoll dress with smocking and a peter pan collar. it's practically begging to get the courtney love treatment, and i'm gonna be the one to give it to it.


yet, true to my gender's age-old afflictions, i remain unsatisfied. i still want:


a moschino gingerbread man clutch. i mean obvs, totally essential.



early 90s chanel pailette covered bra top. i would wear this with an oversized boyfriend blazer and silk/rayon blend harem pants, all while smoking benson & hedges cigarettes and watching melrose place re-runs.




chanel ice cream print dress. amazing, right? this happens to be one of the not-so-rare instances for me on ebay that the model is totally killing it for me (killing it in a bad way (not bad like 'dude, you are so bad!' but bad bad). did they really have to put this beautiful piece on a tranny built like one of the real housewives of orange county? ick. whatever, i still put a bid on it. eeeks!




a mickey mouse print vintage fur coat. amazing! and $1800?!?! dream on, japanese ebay seller, dream on. totally reminds me of the gypsies trying to sell $800 miu miu brocade coats even though they are like from ages ago, and refuse to answer my numerous messages about accepting my best offer. i hope ebay smites you with sky high relisting fees.



like this amazing miu miu dress from quite possibly the best collection ever, spring 2008. $741, dear british seller? shit i really want it, let's pray i can harass them into selling it to me for a more reasonable price.



normally, i would never endorse any product sold under the pseudonym "rockstar clothing," but in this instance, i must make an exception. case in point, pepe le pew t-shirt, as worn by slash in the use your illusion tour dvds. with my skinny leather topshop pants and this shirt, all i need is a gay cellphone holder clipped to my waistband, and i'm basically mr. hudson (don't think i didnt see that lame ass picture of slash with the cellphone clipped to his waistband. talk about killing the fantasy!)!.



with this coat, i'm straight out of 1988 london. all i need is my marc jacobs zippered boots and a really skinny boyfriend who sneers and spits a lot. it's coats like these that make me wish i had an accent. ughh.



marc jacobs fall 2007 jumpsuit. i would slick my hair back, wear ysl red lipstick, and take on many young lovers in this jazzy little number. pray i get my paws on this one- it's hard to come by!



i know, i know. totally quinceanera meets scarlett o'hara meets hallmark valentines day card, but im such a sucker for hearts, chiffon, tulle, bows, studs, or zippers. 3 out of the 6 accoutrements that usually determine whether or not i want something badly means i should definitely get it. imagine if anything, ANYTHING, were to come out with hearts, chiffon, tulle, bows, studs, and zippers, all at once?! i think i would immediately fall to the floor in a fit of seizures and totally blow a blood vessel in my brain.

that's it for now. my credit cards are quivering in fear.

sick

so this year, i expanded my vocabulary (yes!) but failed to curb my shopping habit (no!). i guess one out of two new years resolutions is decent. this coming may, me julia and gloria are going to london, spain, and most importantly, paris. every purchase since the hatching of our crackpot idea has me thinking "hmm, how will this look while i'm strolling down the champs elysees?" unfortunately for my bank account, more times than not, the answer is FABULOUS!

recent proof


spring 08 ysl sleeveless jersey blazer. with my high waisted leather skinny pants from topshop. channeling kate lanphear. mmmmm


speaking of kate, she is the sole reason i had to own these stella wedges. the picture of her weaing the black bootie versions haunted my days and nights. creepy.


my hats off to topshop for making the best bootlegs in the biz (take notes, ioffer with your nasty fake louboutins. eew) thanks for giving me a lucious piece of miu miu spring '08 without the $1250, calorie-laden price tag.


i promise, i will kick the topshop habit soon. high waisted, black denim hotpants with gold studs all over the sides. one would think i would look like a mexican or mayan warrior in this ensemble, but that one would think wrong. i look like the malnourished love child of carine and david lee roth.



and i've currently got my sights set on these bad boys


totally amazing sheer body con dress. kind of robert palmer video girl meets alexander wang's similar number.



i know i'm not gamine enough to pull off the jean seberg bullshit, but with this by malene birger top i might have to give it a go.




studded cross body leather bag from topshop, since my bat cross body bag so conveniently became a handheld clutch after both straps broke causing me to lo




so new wave romantic. it's like adam ant at a jazz club. just when you think it doesn't work, you're like, hey man, it totally makes sense.




there is nothing more i want from this world than to own some rodarte fall '08 deconstructed knits. unfortunately for me, nordstrom rack has like two seafoam green/sparkly cowl neck sleeveless jumpers for like $400 each. i think i'll pass and snatch up with homemade, seditionaries style jumper. aaannddd



some of the matching leggings too. my awesomeness would know no bounds.



i totally want these ysl boots from ebay too. i walk like a cave man, so may shoe choices are limited to wedges and boots. ok ok ok this boot in paris? insane!


i went to palm springs this weekend and had an amazing time. school starts next week (a little bit of my joy dies every time i think that), but it is my last semester!

2009 has the makings to be a very very good year!

broke

ok so i could look at the new us topshop site for HOURS. i swear, it's like my personal porn. somebody grab me some ky and a kleenex! nothing does me like an adorable cocktail dress.

recent acquisitions

bernhard willhelm cutout skirt



topshop bat purse and musical note p


little drummer girl vintage 60s dress. i think i want it shortened. with my thigh high leather boots.. oh child!



here is the real question keeping me up at night.. do i keep these chanel tights? i bought two, one to sell on ebay, and one as a little something something for myself. will these be a classic piece i can bust out on any occassion, or are they so special that they date themselves specifically to this season??




almost acquisitions (there isn't a day that goes by that i don't think of that saints dress)




to be acquired in the future

LaRok dress. holy hell



from left to right: topshop bootleg miu miu brocade mini dress, bootleg balmain tuxedo jacket (but it's soooo stooges-era iggy meets david johansen right??!) and just a lovely little frock.



westwood platforms. of course in my size. yes please.


these leg avenue zipper backed knee highs. love them!





on another note, me and julia are launching yankee rose in the next few weeks. I can't wait to take the eBay world by storm!

on another note, i will be turning tricks in your local neighborhoods to help fuel my addiction. if you see me on your corner, holla

things are looking up

there is much reason to be joyful on this gorgeous day: i am the proud mother of these glorious boots. marc by marc f/w 08 09. so incredible. they are like the lovechild of comme des garcons and ann demeulemeester. i have been wearing them nonstop since they arrived on my doorstep yesterday. i never knew what love was, until these boots. sorry, chloe platforms. suckers.




after shelling out an ungodly amount of money on these babies, i swore myself i would kick cold turkey, at least for a couple of months. of course, never the poster child for fidelity, my eye tends to wander.

like take these amazing, glam rock lightning bolt heeled miu miu pumps. definitely a markdown purchase but ahh anything with a hint of michael monroe and i am a believer.

vivienne westwood pirate boots in black. i was thinking maybe the brown. but regardless, definitely a timeless wardrobe staple. westwood is a piece of history. i would like a piece of that pie.

vintage majorette costume. i can't put my finger on it, but something about this hot little number just drives me wild. i think it would be so adorable for a night on the town, with some black opaque tights and black platforms, and of course, a sunny disposition on life. ahh!

vintage norma kamali dolman sleeve dress. i love the red and black together and i love the way she drapes the jersey in all her pieces. ahhh must have!

h&m pleather skirt. layered accordingly, this could be the skirt i wear more than any other skirt i have ever owned, knocking the busted silver sequin skirt out of its place.

finally, as a replacement for my beautiful leather jackets that were so viciously stolen from me one doomed night several weeks ago, this christopher kane for topshop leather jacket. looks like mike and chris but with more detailing, and hundreds cheaper. i also find that once you let the hysteria die down on designer collaboration collections, you can score the pieces for super cheap. only $200 for this gem!

in life news, i hope this Stylist tv thing pulls through and i get to be on the show for sure. and i hope i get lots of free clothes and that i don't look like a kook on television! and that i win! i want to fulfill my life dream of wearing all black, and like j peterman black slacks, smoking capris, telling people they look fabulous and be hideously overpaid for it. a girl can always dream!

in more life news, my boyfriend comes home from Virginia after what feels like a lifetime. i can't wait to see him!

everybody from the hood is up to no good

my favorite runway show to date is the s/s 06 number (n)ine mens show. there have been few shows that have hit so close to home.




perfection. this is inspiration at its finest.

i have been ebaying like a mad woman lately. for a long while, i was experiencing a serious losing streak. and much to my bank account's detriment, not anymore. recent victories:



near mint condition chanel 04 cruise collection ice cream print shoes. chanel is instant class. i could wear these with assless pleather chaps and booby tassles and i'd still make people go 'you know, she reminds me of a young jackie o.'



detachable ostrich feather collar. im thinking paired with a leather bomber jacket and skinny jeans, or over my winter coats, with some serious eyebrows and not much else. i just hope it doesn't smell weird or shed like crazy.



anna sui suit. the skirt is super high waisted too. only 31 dollars. im going to take it to the tailor and make it fit like a glove. white gloves, pillbox hat, and my platform chloe boots to not make it so costumey. mmmm



these vintage platforms are a 10. i cant wait to see what i can concoct with these bad boys.



i just got this vintage betsey dress in the mail today. it reminds me so much of miu miu spring 08. since i don't have $1225 to spend on a dress, this is the next best thing. the fit is incredible but i'm having trouble making a complete, wearable outfit with it. usually, i would throw my leather motorcycle jacket over it and wear it with some boots, but my vehicle was ransacked for many precious belongings, including leather jackets, ipod dock, boots, my magnificent cd case that held the true treasures of music past, and other things. gone gone gone. the world is an ugly place. at least i buy pretty things to make it a little less gray.



and currently, i've got my sights set on these bad boys:




how chic is this chanel dress? with my thigh high skinny leather boots. and fingerless leather gloves. and a capri. im totally swooning.



i want to wear these with skinny, cropped, high waisted black tuxedo pants with my hands in my pockets and a brooding look on my face.



so angry that i need another, but completely necessary.



is this a little too 90s? i think i had one like this when i was a child. im about to be 22 in a few weeks, so i need to recapture as much of my fleeting youth as possible.



it's actually pistachio colored. with a pretty flower brooch and some black tights, i think this would be a good drinking and dancing dress.



this is actually from satine's website and i really really want it but i just cant justify spending hundreds on it. this calls for operation bootleg.



finally, i am desperately in love with this jacket. i want to wear it with hotpants and thigh high boots, or skinny white jeans and a white cravat and black beatle boots and my chanel chain sunglasses. id totally keep the shoulder pads in there too. look at that silhouette. it makes me all tingly thinking about it.


if anyone has the number to a good group therapy for shopping addicts, i would be terribly interested. i saw the mtv true life 'i have a shopping addiction' and these girls were like 20 grand in debt for wet seal and forever 21 shit. so so sad. go big, or go home.

GIBBONS!

I was watching the news tonight when a particular news item struck a chord...a chord about the gibbons!

In my Saddleback anthropology class a couple of years ago we went on an extra credit field trip to the gibbons conservation center up in santa clarita. Once i saw those cute endangered gibbons humping their cages, i knew i was a goner. Since then, I have discovered that you can volunteer to live at the dorms at the Gibbons center (minimum 1 month and you cant leave) and help take care of the gibbons. as soon as i am done with my last semester (fall) that is exactly what i intend on doing. im planning my steez to be jane goodall meets eva gabor in green acres. goodbye city life!


anyway, they are developing new housing projects in santa clarita dangerously close the once isolated gibbons center. the noise is scaring the gibbons and there is a chance they might catch valley fever from the construction. alan (the gibbon man/master/myth) wants to move the center up to ventura where they will have a lot more room and isolation.

they need money to move the gibbons! just $10 buys enough vitamins for one gibbon for one month. imagine a gibbon eating a vitamin that you bought it...adorable!

http://www.gibboncenter.org/contribute.htm
have a heart, put down your cheeseburgers and throw some pocket change to our primate friends.

in other news, i haven't blogged in quite some time. i was trying to make it a regular thing, but no dice. i'm a busy lady.

i bought a new bathing suit: isn't it gorgeous? i want to carry a black parasol and then drown myself in the ocean. Oh! and I bought this Betsey Johnson one on the right too. i think everyone is going to call me granny with that kind of high waist but i can take the criticism. assholes.









I'm also in a watching frenzy on ebay.

I want this vintage tux jacket so i can put a sneer on my face, howl, and try to look like david johansen. the right moves with this jacket? dangerous

so this luella jacket is totally gauche and im totally in love with it.

karen walker bloomers. adorable! seriously no one is going to want to hang out with me once i throw these babies on. they will feel infinitely threatened by my nonthreatening-adorableness. plus, i only have a couple more years of wearing this kind of stuff. then it just wont be cute anymore. more sad than anything. theyll say, 'look at the poor old crow trying to recapture her youth. sucker.'

and finally, an ivory telephone purse. i dont know why i love these things so much but i have several and im not a big believer in singular things. singular telephone purses, singular bathing suits...

oh.. i also want this too.

it's axl's tattoo. i kind of want to put it on one of my leather jackets.. but im slightly apprehensive. hmm.

wish me luck!